Inkpop posed me this challenge today: What wouldn't you find in the Hunger Games Arena? I just had to respond.
What you wouldn't find in the Hunger Games Arena:
"Be the change you wish to see in the Hunger Games arena" just doesn't flow nicely.
2. A The Hunger Games for Dummies manual.
That would just be way too easy.
3. A diary
"Dear Diary: Today I tried to shoot a kid, but he shot at me instead and barely missed..."
Because he fell into a pit of lava, duh! Also because the Gamemakers would be creeped out after he had hissed "My precious..." for the thousandth time.
How annoying would that be? You're about to attack someone, and then you hear a bunch of blondes in miniskirts chanting, "H-U-N-G-E-R G-A-M-E-S! That's what we call the Hunger Games!"
6. Jack Sparrow
He'd win way too fast, or he'd just run around with his jar of dirt.
Who has time to swap when you're running for your life?
8. The Complete Works of William Shakespeare
For obvious reasons.
9. A massage chair
And after you're done attacking people, you can sit back and relax!
So, there you have it. Anything I missed?
PS: Ghandi actually was a contest winner.